Golden’s view of loved.

I have ‘loved’, “loved”, & loved

Is there a difference? If so what’s the difference? Aren’t they all love? The answer is yes and fucking NO. Yes because they are the same word. No because the way it is used is solely based on the context. Not all uses of loved are necessarily a good thing. As Siren has pointed out so many times. The term is often used out of context and a vast majority of the time people use it in the wrong manner.

I swear he loved me. I don’t know why he does/did these things.

Many random women.

So what’s the difference? Does it even fucking matter?

Yes it fucking matters! So many assholes out there (and I mean mainly men) pull the “loved” game as Siren has mentioned so many times. And like she’s said so many of these ass clowns are just looking for a place to put their clocks, which makes them feel good, but also leaves the women ‘loved’. More like just fucking used. I am guilty of being this person a few times. Four or five times that I can recall.

These women I ‘loved’, essentially all our interactions were based on sex. Just a let’s have sex to have sex. No emotions or connections. Just my cock and whatever hole(s) that we agreed upon for that interaction. Does it fulfill your soul? No. Does it satisfy an emotional need? No. Does it fulfill an animalistic desire? Sometimes. Are these interactions a one time deal or longer? Both.

If ‘loved’ is about sexual aspects, then what is “loved”? “Loved” can be seen as a game to a vast majority of men and women out there (mainly men). This is a way of manipulation and eliciting responses from someone. As Siren stated, this game of emotional roulette is a way to achieve so many things. Both good and bad. I’m my opinion it’s more of a I want this from you, so what do I need to do to get it.

“Loved” can be used in so many tenses and situations.. This could be statements that make you feel great, give you the euphoric state of existence, increase your self esteem, or even let the person stating these words or “facts” feel better about themselves. In this case there is almost always an endgame. It is very rare that there isn’t an ulterior motive(s) behind this use.

What do you mean by “loved”?

By saying loved you could mean that you had a connection of some type. A great example of a connection was when I met Siren. Up to that point in my life all of the girlfriends and casual acquaintes didn’t satisfy my intellectual desire. She intrigued me from the first time we met (and still does). We had our sexually moments as well. But I truly feel that we might have been able to move from “loved” to loved.

We are still friends today (hence why I’m writing here). We don’t talk frequently, but it’s nice to know that we have that level of connection.

What is loved?

Loved is the trust form of the emotion. Being a current relationship, past relationship or anything that keeps you feeling truly great all the time, even if you are fighting. Truly being loved encompasses all of the other levels of loved. So many people don’t ever know this level of loved. Many who crave it may never get it. While not everyone understands this level of loved, it is truly amazing. It’s like one of those ridiculous romantic comedies, but in real life. There are a bunch of other emotions which can follow the concept of being loved.

Can you go from step to step?

Yes you can. Many of my relationships never got past the “loved” stage. I have only been in two loved relationships. One of them I totally fucked up, but the current one is 10+ years and counting.

I have to say that I highly believe that you can go both directions with the “loved” stage. In fact I know you can, as I’m guilty as fuck with that. I’ve had quite a few relationships went from one step to another with it going lower or never moving anywhere until you get so fucking sick of it that you move on.

My confessions

I’ve never been a truly good person in relationships. While I’ve had some long lasting and fun relationships I was never really happy nor able to find what fit my soul. Sometimes it was just a “patch” to get me through. This was an empty way to live. Just as Siren, we both have had multiple partners. At one point I did have multiple partners at the same time, just not together. Some of the people who know me started calling me “man whore”. It was true though. With a simple text I could be laid that night or within the hour of sending the text. I also had a couple of my girls who would message me wanting to just fuck.

These two women ended up helping me to start on my path of being with just one person. Plus I really started to develop feelings for one of them to the point where I started to rapidly move away from “love” to loved. It started out as casual meetings, then to fucking and doing some light BDSM stuff. Before we went our separate ways, I started asking her on proper dates, showing PDA, and wanting to do more couple items other than just fucking.

I even (typical dude statement) took the virginity of 5 women. One of which was truly just an in and out. She laid there like a dead fish.

Do I regret any of my decisions? Yes and no. Yes because I look back and I’m at a loss for why I fucked that person, but at the same time I wouldn’t be where I am today if I hadn’t.

Are there any people who you’d like to be with again? Fuck yes! Siren being the first. Her and two others. One of which I’ve had multiple relationships with and we just can’t keep our clothing on/out of bed when we are together.

With all the decisions and actions that I’ve taken, it’s a wonder that I don’t have any kids running around out there. Even with Siren we made some questionable (to others) decisions.

In the end loved is subjective to each person. Some people may only want to fuck and not commit. Others may want both, then some want it all.